Depression Sucks
Wednesday, December 9th, 2009
Although at this moment, as I write this, I am not depressed, I understand how depression feels – and it SUCKS! You lose all sense of energy, not wanting to get out of bed, laying on the couch all day, over eating or not eating. I think a lot of times it’s worse in the morning. I’ll be sleeping, having dreams and then I wake up. All I want to do is go back to sleep to re-enter my fantasy world of dreams. In dreams everything is perfect and you can be anything you want. It’s the escape from reality. In dreams, there are no financial problems, no relationship problems, you can even fly if you want to.
One thing about depression is that it is very difficult to get motivated. It takes so much effort to even do the simplest things. For instance, you know you have to go to the store to get food, but you don’t want to take a shower, you don’t want to get dressed, all you want to do is lay in bed or the couch and go back to sleep. It takes so much effort to even do the simplest tasks.
The thing is, you need to fight it. You need to get out of that bed. You need to get that report done. One thing I find very difficult it concentrating. My work involves a lot of mental activity and concentration- and more often then not I have to be honest, i get side tracked when I am depressed. The thing is though, when I do accomplish something - I actually feel good and for that short amount of time, I am not depressed. but then it seems like i can’t keep that feeling sustained for very long. I can’t keep the motivation.
Another thing is the fine line with being depressed and having friends. When a person is suffering from depression they want to know they aren’t alone. The problem is – you can be surrounded by people and you can still feel very alone. People that don’t suffer from clinical depression, more often then not, don’t understand. They’re attitude is “just snap out of it”. They don’t understand how much effort it takes. That it’s not just a matter of being “down”. They don’t want to hear about the problems day after day and often times, they will withdraw, which makes the depressed person feel worse and more alone. The feeling of no one caring, no one to turn to sets in.
As I’ve said, being depressed sucks.
